PG has a FBF that we will call Deutsch. He recently moved to Ohio to do graduate school. This is the opposite of the normal pattern, whereby people from Ohio move to Georgia. Something about trying to get to Florida, and running out of gas halfway through.
Deutsch has been keeping up on facebook. He wrote “I think I have a mullet now. I don’t know how to feel.” Somebody added “It makes me look just like a cow. Or a pig that needs to squeal.”
Apparently, Deutsch knows someone who reads Cosmopolitan. There was a post, 17 Shades of Stupid: Cosmo’s Worst BDSM Tips. There is no hint of a memorial to Helen Gurley Brown here. PG skimmed over this list.
9 – “Out at dinner, massage him over his pants — stop when he becomes hard. You want him to squirm throughout the meal like a two-year-old who needs to pee.”
13 – “Lie across an ottoman, and tell him, ‘Professor Wankerton, I’ve been bad and need a spanking.’”
15 – “Instruct him to wrap your chest and torso in plastic wrap and touch you through it — the muted sensation feels amazeballs.”
When you googlize the phrase “cosmopolitan bdsm,” the results are painful. Cosmopolitan.uk reports “Cupid.com have surveyed 2,000 dating Brits and found couples are not quite as prudish and ‘vanilla’ in the bedroom as we first thought thanks to the Fifty Shades of Grey phenomenon.”
A blog chimes in, Cosmo Has Some Terrible 50 Shades Of Grey Inspired BDSM Tips For You To Try. “What happens when the towering work of literature that is 50 Shades Of Grey collides with the erotic genius of Cosmo? A list of sex tips that would make Christian Grey jizz all over himself! I mean, assuming he likes ice cubes on his dick or eating food off his lady. Because all editions of Cosmo must contain at least one reference to each of those things. It’s in the bylaws.”
The Cosmonut Strikes Back (Emma Goldman’s materialistic lovechild) is a blog with a cool template, which PG might want to use at Chamblee54. (The template would reduce the picture width by 80 pixels. It is not going to happen.) The article about Cosmo was not very good.
The last thing published there is My beer is taunting me. “I bought myself a sixer of Magic Hat No. 9 yesterday, and I discovered that the bottlecaps include little phrases on them. My first one said “You need to write more” The second said “Heed the Spirit. If You can Hear It” The third said “Don’t hex what’s best” My personal favorite read “You were expecting something funny?” No, I wasn’t. I wasn’t even expecting my beer to tell me to write more. Which I’m doing, obviously.”
Another blog chiming in is Evil Slutopia: Home of the evil slut clique. “After years and years of boring repetetive sex tips and describing the “tie your man’s wrists with a silk scarf” trick as the most outrageous, naughtiest sex act ever, Cosmopolitan magazine has decided to endorse bondage… sort of. Yes, the April 2011 issue of Cosmo actually has the words “KINKY SEX” on its cover!”
This trendy sadism is usually blamed on Fifty Shades of Grey. It turns out that FSOG is sort of a publishing phenomenon. It was an internet “fanfic” that went intensely commercial. Obsidian Wings has a three part series about FSOG. Publishing may never be the same. (Spell check suggestions for FSOG: FOG, FROG, FLOG, SOGGY)
So, we need to consider the book before this post goes on too much more. PG has not read it, and there is little chance that he will. The next quote is part of a one star review at amazon. It seems like the author likes repetition.
*UPDATE*: Thanks to the many other perturbed readers who have shared their own choices of the most annoyingly overused phrases in this masterpiece. Following up on their suggestions with my ever-useful Kindle search function, I have discovered that Ana says “Jeez” 81 times and “oh my” 72 times. She “blushes” or “flushes” 125 times, including 13 that are “scarlet,” 6 that are “crimson,” and one that is “stars and stripes red.” (I can’t even imagine.) Ana “peeks up” at Christian 13 times, and there are 9 references to Christian’s “hooded eyes,” 7 to his “long index finger,” and 25 to how “hot” he is (including four recurrences of the epic declarative sentence “He’s so freaking hot.”). Christian’s “mouth presses into a hard line” 10 times. Characters “murmur” 199 times, “mutter” 49 times, and “whisper” 195 times (doesn’t anyone just talk?), “clamber” on/in/out of things 21 times, and “smirk” 34 times. Christian and Ana also “gasp” 46 times and experience 18 “breath hitches,” suggesting a need for prompt intervention by paramedics. Finally, in a remarkable bit of symmetry, our hero and heroine exchange 124 “grins” and 124 “frowns”… which, by the way, seems an awful lot of frowning for a woman who experiences “intense,” “body-shattering,” “delicious,” “violent,” “all-consuming,” “turbulent,” “agonizing” and “exhausting” orgasms on just about every page.
Pictures are from “The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”.
This web page at http://www.awkwardboners.com has been reported as an attack page and has been blocked based on your security preferences. ~ I met the Italians at the Townhouse for drinks. Then I took the subway in the wrong direction and found myself in Brooklyn. A bit fuzzy from the Bombay Sapphire Maritinis, I asked the conductor who leaned through the car window of the 7 train, “Does this go to 42nd where I can connect to the #1?” He said yes and I entered with skepticism. In the course of the trip I saw the Chrysler Building more than once. I never take the #7. It was quite fantastic, and the faces were all new. The people of the #7. I got home and took off my shoes: turquoise boaters. I stepped out of them next to the other pairs I have worn today for biking, an interview, gym. I was filled with a desire for a life wherein one wears only one type of shoe all day long and every day. One pair of shoes for the year and if they wear well, for several years. Who lives like that? Do you know anyone who has only one pair of shoes from dawn to dusk and through all four seasons. That’s what I want. I don’t know anyone who has that life. I will be the first. (fb) ~ What kind of person would ever run a blog like this ? Truly disgusting if you ask me. Anonymous ~ But no one asked you ~ Self-pity is easily the most destructive of the nonpharmaceutical narcotics; it is addictive, gives momentary pleasure and separates the victim from reality. – John W. Gardner (fb) ~ Meditation: There’s a truth in every lie, and falsehood in every truth. If you watch the mechanics of how a magic trick works…its means little. If you sit back and enjoy the ride you get a whole show, one that may remind you of what endless possibility felt like. How is showing potential a lie? Deeply our hearts knows the freedom and mobility of spirit…sometimes we need reminders that limitation is yet another fleeting illusion. (Does any one want me to do this for the whole major arcana? I need moral support here!) (fb) ~ A door to door preacher just visited. He asked ” Where can I go to find truth”. I told him that seeing him walk down the driveway would be truth. ~ “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” ― E.E. Cummings (fb) ~ “I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken – and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived. ” ― Margaret Mitchell (fb) ~ “Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson (fb) ~ Creating only shares some information publicly. If you know Creating, send her a friend request or message her.~ Twitter says that the tweet threatening to hang me is “not actionable.” – “We have investigated the reported account and have found that it’s not in violation of the Twitter Rules at this time. We have a policy against violent threats, but the content of this account lacks the specificity to meet the criteria of an actionable threat.” (fb) ~ When everyone is trying to be something, be nothing. Range with emptiness. Human should be like a pot. As the pot is hold by its emptiness inside, human is hold by the awareness of his nothingness.(fb) ~ Please don’t “thank” me for my patience. Just apologize for your incompetence and the inconvenience. (fb) ~ Religion is for people afraid of going to hell.. Spirituality is for people who have already been there… (fb) ~ “The difference between a GOP convention and Comic-Con is the people at Comic-Con have a much firmer grasp of reality.” — Bill Maher (fb) ~ There was a sign once. It said that G-d handles all problems. My question was, does this refer to the creation of problems, or their solution? ~ What is significant in one’s own existence one is hardly aware, and it certainly should not bother the other fellow. What does a fish know about the water in which he swims all his life? Alber Einstein ~ In urban political geography today, my professor said, “Yeah, I really don’t know why this local pride or local solidarity thing manages to convince urban populations to do things. I suppose someone must have done some work on that, but buggered if I have any idea what it is.” … really? REALLY? This is a well-respected social scientist – a geographer, true – at the end of a long career. I may not be on top of the economic sources of power in urban politics, but it comforts me to know that there are some questions that anthropology speaks well on, and other disciplines do not. /pretentious (fb) ~ I find this whole trend of people re-questing to be “de-friended” based on support of a political party alarming. I also fell that right out “de-friending” someone based on political affiliation is equally as alarming When you do this you become a singular “party of no”. You end the conversation, you move backwards, you create a greater divide. I understand that differing views are personal on many levels but this is not progress or forward momentum. We must keep conversations open and start to bridge the divide not widen it. If I had one major take away from The First Lady’s speech last night it is this. No matter if you’re Democrat, Republican, Moderate, we are all Americans and in this thing together for the long haul. Let’s keep building bridges so that haul is a little less of a burden. (fb) ~ “History is a cyclic poem written by Time upon the memories of man.” ~ Percy Bysshe Shelley (fb) ~ Whats up, yes I am still in need of a man to meetup with. I’m not in need of a committed relationship how ever, there simply are not enough minutes in the day. I’m only in need of a man as a sex buddy, Both of us get what we need with none of the commitments. ~ True story…. before I was born my Mom was discussing baby names with her canasta group gals from St Matthews in the ‘Boro and said she was going to name a boy baby ‘John’. One of the other ladies exclaimed to her, “Oh, don’t name him ‘John’! Every Tom, Dick and Harry’s named ‘John’!’ ” :>) (which was pretty close….the Prez, Pope, our parish priest and our family Dr who delivered me were all ‘John’) (fb) ~ this month october has 5 mondays, 5 tuesdays, and 5 wednesdays. this happens once every 823 years. this is called money bags. So share this on your wall and money will arrive within 4 days. (Based on Chinese Feng Shui) ~ White coral bells upon a slender stalk, Lilies of the valley deck my garden walk. On, don’t you wish that you could hear them ring? That will only happen when the fairies sing. ~ The artist uses the talent he has, wishing he had more talent. The talent uses the artist it has, wishing it had more artist. ~Robert Brault (fb) ~ Somebody listened to Joseph Campbell too long. ~ The blogger who condemns Fr. DeVito is named Mary Griffin. If you’d like to let her know how you feel about her self-righteous and judgmental position, you can email her at email@example.com. I promised both Fr. DeVito and his cousin that our conversations would be off-the-record but I will say that, years from now, when the next generation of bishops and cardinals and popes will suddenly listen to the Holy Spirit and announce to us that women may be ordained, that married people may be ordained and that gay is a non-issue, we will all be arguing about whether Fr. DeVito’s strategy of remaining within the church while working in subtle ways to usher in these changes was right or wrong. Should he have boldly proclaimed his convictions and been given the boot as have other priests? No matter which side of that argument is yours, you will owe him some degree of thanks for the good he has accomplished. Note to Bishop Man-Sell, if you now want to echo what you personally believe about LGBT equality, you can do it by making DeVito a monsignor, or is that too fearless a gesture for you? (fb) ~ There was a yard sale on the way back. Someone has cleaned out a den, and has ten boxes of VHS movies for sale. For two dollars, PG took home The Treasure of Sierra Madre, North by Northwest, Rear Window, Days of Heaven, Torch Song Trilogy, Carrie, Forbidden Planet, A Hard Days Night, Das Boot, and The Dirty Dozen. Unopened sets of James Bond movies are still available. ~ can we go back to when Facebook was about Farmville and untagging terrible, drunken photos? I’d rather get 10,000 Mafia Wars invites instead of reading desperate pleas of people trying to validate their opinions/thoughts/existences through a screen. (fb) ~ We don’t use logic when we think. We use logic when selling/defending what we have thought. ~ everybody is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid. ~ Don’t believe everything you hear people say. ~ “You can’t convince a believer of anything; for their belief is not based on evidence, it’s based on a deep seated need to believe.” – Carl Sagan (fb) ~ I write like says this display of effluent was written like William Shakespeare. Does this support the Infinite monkey theorem? Pictures are from The Library of Congress. ~ Selah
This is my 911 story. I repeat it every year at this time. Pictures today are from ” The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”.
I was at work, and someone called out that someone had run a plane into the World Trade Center. I didn’t think much of it, until I heard that the second tower had been hit, then the Pentagon, then the towers collapsed, then a plane crashed in Pennsylvania.
I focused on my job most of the day. There was always a lot of melodrama at that facility, and concentrating on my production duties helped to keep me saner. This was roughly the halfway point of my seven year tenure at this place.
One of the other workers was a bully for Jesus. He was a hateful loudmouth. After the extent of the damage became known, he shouted “They are doing this for Allah,” and prayed at his desk. The spectacle of the BFJ praying made me want to puke.
I became alienated from Jesus during these years. Once, I had once been tolerant of Christians and Jesus, as one would be with an eccentric relative. I began to loath the entire affair. I hear of others who found comfort in religion during this difficult time. That option simply was not available for me.
PG has reread How to choose a guru, by Rick Chapman. The book is a look at spirituality of all sorts, with a special emphasis on Meher Baba.
HTCAG can be a frustrating book. The main focus is on finding a “perfect master”, and the path to enlightenment under his guidance. If one is not inclined to this level of dedication, you can be left feeling inferior. This is similar to the despair people feel when they think they are going to go to hell, because they don’t have the correct ideas about Jesus.
Thie book takes a look at spirit from the perspective of all religions. A central concept is the avatar, the idea of G-d become man. (This was long before the movie with a similar title.) The avatars of recorded history include Zoroaster, Rama, Krishna, Buddha, Jesus, and Mohammed. Some say that Meher Baba is the modern avatar.
Mr. Chapman has a knack for phrasing. There are expressions that PG remembers from reading HTCAG in 1978. They are still there 34 years later.
Creation First, there was G-d. Then, there’s you. Then, there is G-d.
Speculation The average persons speculation about consciousness…has “the stink but not the weight of his turd”
Evangelism An authentic Master will encourage you to let your life itself be his message.
Good Thoughts, Good Words, Good Deeds Don’t be sidetracked by elaborate creeds and doctrines- the truth is as simple as it is profound. From the ancient teachings of Zoraster to today, these three principles have been the heart of the message of every G-d realized Master.
Books “Excellent guides until you find the Way.”–Abu Sa’id
Books Part Two …the scriptures of the past compare to the writings of a present-day Perfect Master just about the way that dust compares to honey.
Satan Worship If you have been toying with the thought that any form of Satan worship can lead you to higher consciousness, sober up by reading the story of Dr. Faustus. There are many paths to enlightenment, but this back alley isn’t one of them.
Sex A real guru never has any form of sexual relations with his followers. If a person posing as a guru tries to seduce you in the physical sense, then you can have no clearer indication that he is a phony, a pathetic and hypocritical collection of unresolved desires.
Truth, Old and New One time the Buddha was approached by a young man who was skeptical about Gautama’s renowned divine status. “Does the Blessed One teach a path that is new and original?” he asked. One of the Buddha’s close disciples, Sariputta, turned his gaze from the Master to the skeptic and replied, “If the Blessed One taught a path that was new and original, He would not be the Blessed One!” “Well said, Sariputta,” smiled the Buddha, “well said.”
Several of these quotes are available in copy/paste form at Meher Baba Information, for which this reporter says thank you. This site says that Rick Chapman is a follower of Meher Baba, and met him in 1966. This relationship is never made explicit in HTCAG. A glowing chapter is devoted to Meher Baba, and this relationship is not surprising. Still, HTCAG might be a bit more upfront if this relationship was clearly spelled out.
Meher Baba was born February 25, 1894 with the name Merwan Sheriar Irani. The name Meher Baba means “compassionate father”. From July 10, 1925 until his death January 31, 1969, he maintained silence, and communicated by gestures that were interpreted by his followers. Meher Baba believed that he was the avatar of our age.
With all of it’s human imperfections, HTCAG is a valuable book. It is easy to read, will expose you to ideas about spirit, and get you to think. When you grow up in a Jesus Worship tradition, one can be aware of a spirit within. At the same time, you get tired of the obsession with life after death. You sense that there is more to G-d than scheming to live after you die. HTCAG shows one path.
This is a repost. It was written like Vladimir Nabokov. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Henry Kissinger told a joke to Richard Nixon. It became known as Mr. Nixon’s favorite joke. A man asked Richard Wagner, Do you spell your name with a W. He replied, Nien, W.
It is 1027 pm, edt, on September 8, 2009. Soon it will be 09-09-09. It is already that day in Europe and Asia, not to mention Africa. If Africa is backwards, remember that it is, time wise, ahead of America by several hours.
)()()( oops, the shift key just loves to make trouble. Lets try this again. Be sure to leave the 9mm alone. Or use the canine squad. If you see Kay, give her love potion number nine.
090909 is a really neat day. And not just because the day after tomorrow is 911, and we know goes on then. 090909 is the last day of its type until 01/01/2101. A day expressed by three zeros and three single digit numbers.
Nine is the largest of the single digit numbers. It is a baseball team, without the DH. A baseball game lasts nine innings, just like a pregnancy lasts nine months. A pregnancy is not considered a complete game if it is rained out after the fifth inning.
Nine is pronounced the same as No in German. Is today known in Berlin as oh no, oh no? Will Yoko Ono make an appearance to celebrate?
Nine is an odd number. Nine is three squared. If you multiply a number by nine, and then add the digits of the sum together, you will get nine. An example is 2×9=18, and 1+8=9.
Nine is six upside down. A pristine pastime popularized 69. Jimi Hendrix wondered if six turned out to be nine, he don’t mind. The Beatles did a song called Revolution number nine, which said “turn me on dead man” if played backwards. Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine.
This was originally posted 090909, and repeated 090910. On 10/10/10, Rin Tin Tin was ignored. In December, 12/12/12 will be observed.
There is a formula for simplicity. Keep it simple, stupid. This saying is an acronym for kiss, which is a popular human activity. The saying is good for things where complications can cause problems.
PG first encountered this expression in Sports Illustrated. Some old quarterback, maybe Yelberton Abraham Tittle, was talking about how to score touchdowns. One illustration of the concept was when Mr. Tittle became known by his initials, Y.A.
The saying has a few flaws. Some people think stupid is a bad word. Others take the saying personally, and think they are being called stupid. It can get complicated, which defeats the purpose.
Yesterday, PG sat in on a “heart weaving workshop”. The idea was to create gimmicks to bring people closer. One of the things say was the intimacy breaks down into “into you I see”. At some point, someone started to write down stuff on a message board.
The words safe and simple were written down. Safety is a big deal these days. The idea of not being in harm’s way is very appealing.
At this point, the idea lightbulb went off in PG’s head. People in the room started to blink, and shield their eyes. Maybe KISS stands forKeep It Safe and Simple.
The KISS epiphany was on a saturday. The next day was the type of glorious sunday morning that was meant to be spent outdoors. In the outdoor office, the coffee ran out at the same time as the pictures to be processed.
But not before PG found one of the 10th Street Art Theater. This was on the strip, next door to the A&P. It was on Peachtree, between 11th and 12th. Or maybe it was between 10th and 11th. It was tough to tell the difference sometimes.
The 10th Street Art Theater showed dirty movies. In the sixties, pornography was gentler, and more innocent. This was the age of Russ Meyer. His flicks graced the screen at TSAT. When “Vixen” played, you could call a phone number and get a personal invitation to come down and see the film.
This is the part of the strip that is conveniently forgotten. There was an urban grunge factor. It was a transitional downtown area, with a lot of sleazy characters. As the summer of love faded into the winter of methedrine, it got worse. The strip became dangerous and complicated.
Pictures are from “The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”.
This was written like William Shakespeare.
This is a repost. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Abraham at twentytwowords wrote… “When I asked about churches last week, some of you reminded me you’re not Christian.So…Non-Christian readers, what (non)religion are you?” That is 23 words.
PG answered the original post “home churched”. He decided to answer the follow up question. Unlike most of the others to answer, PG wanted to keep this under 22 words.
There is a tradition in the Baptist Church to make a “profession of faith”, usually when the kid is around 10. For various reasons, PG never did this, and was never baptized. PG decided when he was 17 to quit attending. He has been to Briarcliff Baptist one time since then…he worked for Redo Blue, and delivered a set of plans to the church office.
PG went back and forth on the religion issue. In 1979, there was a week in Camp K, a moonie facility. After reading, thinking, and prayer, PG chose to live in harmony with esus worshipers. Jesus was like an eccentric, though lovable, relative.
There were seven hellish years working closely with the Bully for Jesus. By the end of that experience, PG was alienated from Jesus. He wished to never hear the J-name mentioned again. Living in the Jesus happy United States, PG could seldom go 24 hours without having Jesus shoved in his face.
After a another temper tantrum by the BFJ, PG wrote down two sentences. “I am not interested in your opinions about G-d, The Bible, Jesus, or life after death. My opinions about G-d, The Bible, Jesus, or life after death are none of your business.”
There probably is not a religion that PG could fit into without a lot of shoehorning. Atheist is out, because PG suspects that there is a G-d. What form she takes is a matter of dispute. As for belief, PG questions that belief is the proper approach to G-d.
Agnostic sounds like something you would blow out of your nose. Judaism is a party that PG is not invited to. Buddhism makes some good points, but PG is awfully occidental. As for christianism, PG sees Jesus in the words and deeds of his believers. In his seven years at redo blue, PG saw an estimated 1400 hours of loud, hateful ministry. I am not talking to you!
As for the obsession with life after death that infects Jesus worship, PG feels pity and disgust. This is not a good focus for a religious practice, nor does it excuse verbal abuse. PG has ideas about life after death, but this post is waaay over 22 words.
PG decided that this label thing was not going to work. Labels belong on jars, and PG’s hair is a half inch over jarhead level. The best solution was to write a list of beliefs. The good news here is that numbers do not count against the total of 22 words.
1. My beliefs are my business. 2. Practice outweighs belief. 3. G-d probably exists. 4. G-d does not write books. 5. Jesus has nothing to do with Life after death.
This is 25 words. Three words need to go. Line 4 states that G-d does not write books. This implies that G-d does, indeed, exist. Line 3 can be eliminated, and the answer reduced to 22 words.
PG was suffering a bout of writer’s tackle. He had a post about G-d and the Democratic convention, but that involves both politics and religion. A couple of paragraphs should knock it out. Then the important topic can be addressed.
Here is the Christian Science Monitor. Two cents just won’t buy what it used to.
“For your undecided voter in Nevada, North Carolina, in Florida, in Ohio, in Pennsylvania – those key swing states, yeah, of course G-d matters,” says Davis Houck, a communications professor at Florida State University in Tallahassee. “And that’s why Obama basically said, ‘You better put that back in – we can’t be seen as the party taking G-d out of the platform.’
Are you smarter than an atheist? A religious quiz
Support for Mr. Obama among religious voters was high in several key states in 2008 and could be key again in 2012. “In an election as close as this one will be, we can’t ignore something as central to most Americans as faith,” Democratic political consultant Eric Sapp wrote on Huffington Post in June.”
Just for the sake of comparison, lets look at Exodus 20:7, better known as the Third Commandment. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy G-d in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
PG thinks this is about the proper use of a sacred name. Including the G word into a political document, to influence the “undecided voter” in a “key swing state,” is not a proper use for a sacred name.
Now, putting politics and religion in the rear view mirror, where they belong, it is time to talk about facebook. The fundamental facebook deed is posting a “status”. This is a curious word for this act, but that’s what people call it.
PG was staring at the screen, battling sloth and negative attitude, and checked in on facebook. Someone wrote “One day I want to copy someone’s status word for word and see if they notice.” PG pasted it to his wall. A cousin in Connecticut clicked like, A friend commented “How do we know you didn’t just do that?” Another person wrote “One day I want someone to copy my status word for word and see if I notice.” Several people pasted that onto the wall. Good times.
Part of left click land is the option to googlize the phrase you have highlighted. For “One day I want to copy someone’s status word for word and see if they notice,” there are 2.9 million results. The top result was by Know your meme.
“Sometimes I Just Want To Copy Someone Else’s Status, Word For Word, And See If They Notice” is a copypasta that virally spread through Twitter and Facebook in late August 2010. The humorous, self-referential text inspired over 1,500 replicate instances of the identical sentence in less than 12 hours. Due to its self-referential nature (i.e., a tweet on the subject of tweeting), it can be seen as an example of meta-discussion.
The earliest known instance of the copypasta tweet was posted by Twitter user @BtoColorado August 18, 2010. On August 24th, Twitter user @DazWolf retweeted the message. It largely went unnoticed. On August 26th, @tim_waters, from Leeds, UK, retweeted the same message at 10:42 a.m. (EST). (Spell Check suggestion for retweeted: regretted) Water’s tweet brought the copypasta into spotlight in the United Kingdom. The trend continued to spread through Facebook status updates.
At 10:52 a.m. (EST), @elspethjane of New York City tweeted the message to her 3,100 followers, quickly picking up coverage from several internet culture blogs like Huffington Post, Urlesque, and TechCrunch among others. The meme was also cited as an example in the article “What Defines a Meme?” published in May 2011 issue of Smithsonian Magazine.”
If you ask Mr. Google for results on the phrase “copy my status”, the top result is a yahoo forum. The question is How do I cut copy and paste into my status on facebook.? This thread was started by terry v (A Top Contributor is someone who is knowledgeable in a particular category.) “I can not do this”.
There is a facebook community, One day i wanna copy someones status word for word and see if they notice. It is liked sixteen times. The only posting is from a spamspinner … “A few guru marketing friends have released a product teaching people how to make money on Facebook.”
There is a Christian website, People I Want to Punch in the Throat On Wednesday, April 27, 2011, the winner was “People Who Post Annoying Things on Facebook.” Unsubscribing is just as effective as resorting to violence. This person did have an amusing commentary on the putrid concept of reposting popular slogans.
There are a lot of annoying posts on Facebook. Let’s see if I can cover the basics: 1. Anything to do with vomit and/or diarrhea. WTH? Who shares this stuff? Why did you think we needed to know this? At least it’s usually it’s kid-centered – I can handle that a lot better than I can hearing about YOUR diarrhea! “Guess who woke up early from his nap and spread his poo poo all over the wall? Uh oh. Silly, King! I’ll post pictures later! ;)”
3. Challenges to repost stuff. You know those ones. They’re about moms, husbands, brothers, sisters special needs kids, cancer survivors, idiots, etc. My mom is the best mom, blah, blah, blah if you love your mom repost this. My kids are the best kids in the world, blah, blah, blah, repost if you agree.
There’s always that one that says something like “let’s see who reposts this” like it’s some kind of gauntlet they’ve thrown down. Psht! If you know me at all, you’ll know a challenge is the worst way to motivate me. I live to break chain letters and this is just another stupid chain letter.
5. People who announce they’re leaving FB. Have you seen any of these? I’d never seen one until a few weeks ago. Now I’ve seen a couple more. They say something like, Life has become too busy and I can’t keep up with Facebook so I’ve decided to leave. Farewell friends and keep in touch!
I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do with this info. Am I supposed to beg them to stay? “No, Joanne, please don’t leave, I love reading your creepy foreplay posts!” Am I supposed to post less so they have less to read on Facebook and then won’t feel so overwhelmed? And what’s with the “keep in touch?” I keep in touch through Facebook, I don’t even know your phone number and I’m never gonna write you a damn letter – so you’re right, I guess this is farewell!
8. Boring posts. These are some actual posts over the last several weeks: … Before you think I’m all high and mighty and NEVER post anything boring and/or annoying on Facebook, I’ll have you know, 2 of the above posts are mine. I’m just as boring as the next guy.
As you can see, this has been edited. This post is going to be too long as it is. Only posts which annoy or amuse PG were included. Perhaps the worst are the challenges to repost. Yes, cancer is terrible, but reposting a dreary status will not make the metastasizing cease and desist.
When PG finished this post, he decided to go to the grocery store. Friday afternoons there can be intense, and it is best to go before the crowds hit. When he turned onto Clairmont Road, there was a red car dangerously close to his bumper. The Lexus swerved into the left lane to pass, with the white male driver talking on his phone. It quickly cut back in front of PG, then slowed down for a red light. The license plate said Cobb.
The pictures today are from “The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”. This was written like Cory Doctorow.
While researching a post about Molly Ivins, PG stumbled onto a lovely site called Booknotes. ( Auto start warning. Nobody is perfect.) This site enables authors promoting their latest books. It seems to have gone out of business in December 2004, but the interviews are still available. PG likes to listen to “stuff” while he edits pictures, and Booknotes appears to be a treasure chest.
The multi tasking soundtrack last night was a chat with Hendrik Hertzberg, who is familiar to readers of The New Yorker. BTW, the majority of TNY readers live west of the Hudson River. Supposedly, the biggest number of readers is in California.
In 1965, Mr. Hertzberg was about to get drafted. At the time, this meant a one way ticket to Vietnam. Young men looked for alternatives to this, some of which were legal and moral. Mr. Hertzberg heard about an organization called the National Student Association. “And so I went to work after college for the National Student Association for a year. And it wasn`t just because the National Student Association was a wonderful cause that advanced liberal ideas and fought communism abroad and all of that sort of thing. Later, we learned that it was a CIA front, but I didn`t know that. What I did know was that if you worked for the National Student Association, you didn`t get drafted, that — it wasn`t exactly that you were deferred, but anyway, nobody got drafted while working for the National Student Association, so it was a way to have a year without worrying about getting drafted.”
The National Student Association has a facebook page, which one person likes. “The 1967 revelation of NSA’s ties to the Central Intelligence Agency sparked a national scandal, but did not measurably damage NSA.”
The CIA was involved in all sorts of things in those days. ( It still is today.) One of the fronts was Radio Free Europe. When PG was a kid, the cartoon shows had a commercial for Radio Free Europe. (It was different from the one embedded here.) These fund raising commercials were part of the scam. These commercials netted around $50k a year, out of a total budget of several million dollars. ( source )
Soon after the war stories, the conversation turns to religion/tribal allegiance. LAMB: Explain this. “The Nuremberg laws would say I`m Jewish. The Law of Return would say I`m not.” HERTZBERG: Well, according to the Nuremberg laws, if you have a — if you had a Jewish father, the Nazi classification, you were a Jew. But the Law of Return, where — what entitles you to citizenship, automatic citizenship in Israel, you`ve got to have to have a Jewish mother. So I`m Jewish one way, I`m not Jewish the other way. I guess I feel sort of 51 percent Jewish because my name, Hertzberg, sounds Jewish, and therefore, people respond to me, often assume that I`m … 100 percent Jewish.”
This conversation was in 2004, when BHO was a little known Senator. Today, BHO, who had a white mother, is routinely considered black. If you go by the laws of the Nazis, BHO is black. If you go by the laws of Israel, BHO is white.
Mr. Hertzberg took a break from journalism to write speeches for President Jimmy Carter. Mr. Hertzberg is a member of the Judson Wellover Society. HERTZBERG: Judson Wellover was the very first White House speech writer. Not the first person to write speeches, ghost write speeches for a president — that would probably be Alexander Hamilton for George Washington — but the first person who was ever hired just to write speeches in the White House was Judson Wellover. He was hired by Warren G. Harding, and he — it was such a matter — it was such a shameful thing to have somebody writing — hired to write speeches that they hid his salary in the budget of the White House garage. And when we started, when Bill Safire and I started the Judson — the society of sort of a marching and chatter society or dinner — we have a dinner every couple of years of White House speech writers from all administrations, we named it after Judson Wellover.
Warren Harding is credited/blamed for coining the phrase “founding fathers”. Was Mr. Wellover involved? Pictures are from “The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”. The spell check suggestion for Hertzberg is Herbert. This is a repost.
This is part seven of an appreciation of Catch 22. This is the last installment of the series. Parts one, two, three, four, five, and six precede it. Pictures are from “The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”..
XXXVII General Scheisskopf PG read chapter forty two, page 472, last night. What might be the longest read ever is over. This is the third attempt at reading Catch 22, and will probably be the last. A fourth reading will not be needed, although dwelling on a few selected parts might be fun. The legend is that a young lady told William Faulkner that she had read Sanctuary four times, and that she did not understand it. The author told her to read it a fifth time. When he heard the word fifth, he got a drink.
When you read a book, the unsung hero is the bookmark. They can be a fancy gift, or a handy scrap of paper. The idea is to mark the place where you finish reading, so you can pick up where you left off. The abbreviation bm is not appreciated.
The bookmark PG used for Catch 22 was in the book when he started the third reading. It is hospital green, and is four inches by five inches. The word MEMO is printed in red letters at the top. The logo for Pro Copy Services is at the bottom, along with their address on Johnson Ferry Road in Marietta. The phone number has a 404 area code, which is a clue to the age of this document. Atlanta went to multiple area codes in the early nineties, and anything OTP is 770. (There are a few exceptions. Chamblee is ITP, and yet was included in the 770 new wave.)
The MEMO sheet is from the shaky days at Redo Blue on Dunwoody Place. In those days, PG operated a Printfold blueprint machine, which was named Brunhilda. The other machine was Aretha. There was a telephone stand, which was a wooden column, made to appear like something from a Greek temple. PG would pick up the phone, and the customer would tell him to send a driver to get a job. This is an important part of the reprographic business.
PG learned very early to write down pickups. His memory, while pretty good for a chronic pothead, simply does not work all the time. If you write something down, and forget to tell the dispatcher, you can look at the paper later. Your memory will be instantly restored. A piece of paper does not forget.
This was a very serious problem with the bully for Jesus. He trusted G-d to help him remember to tell the dispatcher. About once a week, there would be a call from the customer. “I called for a pickup, but no one is here” “Who did you talk to?” “That guy that is always preaching”. A written note is more effective than prayer.
The bookmark was created long before the the bully for Jesus caused his turmoil. There are five pickups written down on it. At 11:10, Brennean Beer Gorman called. They were building an office near Perimeter Center, and sent a man named Charley Ginste to supervise the field operation. BBG was a New York firm. The way Mr. Ginste talked reflected this.
The second pickup was at 11:45. It was Nancy, at WW. This would be Weaver Withers. They designed shopping centers. John Weaver was a legend in the Atlanta architecture industry. He was described as a typical architectural tyrant, always threatening to quit and go sell vacuum cleaners.
The third pickup was from L.J. Hooker, at Live Oak Parkway. It was at 12:00. At 3:00, there was another pickup for L.J.Hooker in Norcross. This was probably the same office. L.J. Hooker was an Australian company, which built a lot of stuff around Atlanta. They bought a couple of blocks on Peachtree Street, between 10th and 11th. This was the heart of the Strip. The plan was to build a super center of some sort, and one day they tore down everything standing on that block. Soon after, the financing for that project evaporated, and the land was a red clay mudpile for ten years.
The last pickup was at 3:10. It was from Bob Gwinn, at a company called Gemcraft. This was the type of company that would drive a blueprinter crazy. They had a special size paper, which you had to order, and could not use for any other customer. They had goofy jobs, where you would run a few sets, replace this original with that original, and run a few more sets. They finally went out of business.
When PG went to another division of Redo Blue, he helped with an inventory. He saw a few packs of the paper that only Gemcraft used. The branch manager said, “they only got us for twenty five dollars”.
PG stuck his foot in his mouth once with Gemcraft. There was a lady who answered the phones, who we will call Sally. PG was talking to Sally, and made a comment about the pot calling the kettle black. Later, PG was talking to one of the drivers, and asked what Sally looked like. “Well, she’s black.”
For those of you who want to discuss Catch 22, Chapter XXXVII is very short. It is the return of Scheisspof, who is now a General. He still likes military parades. Mrs. Sheisskopf is left behind in the states, which means the whores in Rome have less competition. In case you were not paying attention earlier, Scheisskopf means shithead in German.
XXXVIII Kid Sister This is another weird chapter. The motto of this blog used to be a quote from Hunter S. Thompson. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The problem was, PG spelled a key word wierd. One day, there was an email correcting his error. The name on the email was the same as the paper boy, who was a year older than PG and would tell the kids about the horrors of eighth grade gym at Cross Keys. It wasn’t the same person.
PG thought that was awfully picky. He was quoting Hunter S. Thompson, and spelled weird incorrectly. Of course, it does matter, and the word was corrected. Just remember, it takes we to be weird.
One of the bosses at Redo Blue was addicted to cliches. Whenever someone used the word me in his presence, the boss would interrupt him and say “this isn’t a me company this is a we company”.
Getting back to the book, Yossarian has decided not to fly anymore missions. Colonel Somethingoranother decides to send him to the whorehouses of Rome. Yossarian finds the whore who loved Nately, and tells her of his death. The whore, who apparently does not have a name, does not take the news well. She tries to stab Yossarian with a bread knife.
The concept of Nately’s whore trying to kill Yossarian continues for the rest of the book. She follows him back to the base, and someone takes her to Northern Italy, straps a parachute on her, and throws her out of the plane. A few days later, NW is back on the base, trying to kill Yossarian. PG suspects that Mr. Heller was having a tough time tying up the loose ends of the story, and had to get creative. It makes for good reading, but you need to disconnect your reality meter.
Unplugging the reality detector is a good idea when dealing with Bret Easton Ellis. He hit the big time with “Less Than Zero” extended his fifteen minutes with “American Psycho”. (with the help of a brilliant marketing campaign) He has written a few more books. The Chamblee library has some of his novels, and they are fun to read. Those characters, and probably Mr. Ellis, do more cocaine in fifteen minutes, before breakfast, than PG has done in his life.
Lately, BEE has become a star twitterwit. He shares these 140 character gems with anyone bored enough to read them. If you get lazy, you can always skip ahead.
@BretEastonEllis And “Breaking Bad” is the most overrated TV series in the history of television. Even though I want to bang the kid with cerebral palsy.
@BretEastonEllis Billy Wilder’s belief that screenplay is ALL is what limits him as a great filmmaker. Why so many artists go with this idea is depressing.
@BretEastonEllis It’s what makes filmmakers and screenwriters kneel at the alter of Billy Wilder. The flaw of his movies is that script is God. It’s NOT.
@BretEastonEllis The fallacy of the theory that TV is better than the best movies is that people believe that WRITING is EVERYTHING when in fact it isn’t.
@BretEastonEllis And please don’t use “The Wire” as an example. Yes, it’s the greatest TV series ever made. But it’s a TV series. It’s not “Vertigo” guys…
@BretEastonEllis Empire irony: Twin Peaks. Post-Empire earnestness: The Killing. I’m not sure which one is more misguided. Insomnia and Ambien: key factors.
@BretEastonEllis Insomnia encourages binge-TV-watching of The Killing and because I’m an addict I’ll have to watch the entire 1st season in the next 5 hours.
@BretEastonEllis Louie hits its third season stride in episodes 4 and 5 where Parker Posey gives an astonishing performance. Ignore earlier comments. Ambien.
@BretEastonEllis Note to self: do NOT take Ambien because of current insomnia situation and start tweeting about favorite records from the 1970s. Delete.
@BretEastonEllis Fifty Shades of Grey: during meeting someone said maybe a female screenwriter would work better. “But I AM a female screenwriter!” I gasped.
@BenjoDiMeo Got 50 Shades of Grey just cause @BretEastonEllis is tweeting everyday bout it. I’ll be damned if this isnt the worst book I’ve ever read
@olilyttelton Is Bret Easton Ellis trying to break some kind of world record for being wrong about the most things in the shortest space of time?
@mrseanpatton @BretEastonEllis hey you should write another novel instead of tweeting your opinion of TV shows. Seriously.
@HrtySpice following Bret Easton Ellis on twitter is a serious excercise in patience and hair removal
XXXIX The Eternal City If Federico Fellini was filming Catch 22, it would have a scene like this chapter. Fellini films were always about an hour too long, and would have been more enjoyable with a box office minded suit editing them.
Yossarian is worried about the kid sister of Nately’s whore. He goes to Rome, without a pass, to try and find her. Milo is going to help, but he is distracted by the prospect of making money selling illegal tobacco. What’s good for M&M Enterprises is good for the country.
Rome is a pretty gnarly place in this chapter. The whorehouse has been broken up, by officials claiming Catch 22 as their justification. The whores are scattered around town, the old man is dead, and the old lady is in shock. Yossarian leaves the house to go into the streets, where rape, murder, and dog beating are happening everywhere. Mike Vick is running for a touchdown, only to have it called back for Catch 22 before the snap.
Yossarian goes by another house, and sees a familiar face, laying dead in the street. It seems like Aarfy was in the house, having raped the lady, and killed her by defenestration. Yossarian is horrified, and goes into the house to berate Aarfy.
Soon military police are knocking on the door. They apologize to Aarfy for bothering him, and arrest Yossarian for being AWOL. When Yossarian gets back to the base, Colonel Korn announces that Yossarian is going home.
PG participates in a group called Gay Spirit Visions. The “mission statement” of this group says “We are committed to creating safe, sacred space that is open to all spiritual paths,” A few years ago, there was a controversy about having a Christian workshop at a retreat. To PG the inclusion of the Christian path would compromise the safe space. Here are some of the postings.
chamblee54 Wed Oct 19, 2005 11:32 am
A few months ago, there was an issue over alcohol at potluck suppers. It seems as though some of our brethren are “in recovery” and do not wish to be around demon rum. This was no sacrifice to me, as I am a retired drinker. However, my sobriety is not threatened by other people drinking, and I would hate to tell someone else that they could not imbibe because of my drinking problem.
Now, how does this relate to Jesus Worship? To me, Jesus and Alcohol are very similar. Some can use either “substance” in moderation. Some lose control and do horrible things.
There is a third similarity of Jesus and Alcohol….neither one works for me.
This is a very emotional, touchy, non rational issue. When I saw the picture of Jesus on the cover of the Visionary, I felt a kick in my gut. My negative feelings toward Jesus are that strong. Just hearing the name Jesus ( with or without the Southern Accent) reminds me of the threats, verbal abuse, and humiliation I have suffered in his name.
Maybe we need to examine this policy of being open to all paths.
Jesus is not just another religion. He is the dominant religion in our culture, and has hurt many of us deeply. If we are to invite Jesus into our circle, we should do it very carefully.
What Would Jesus Do? Go to the water cooler and get a glass of wine.
jaxhairyman2Wed Oct 19, 2005 1:18 pm
THAT was one of the more stupid things I ever read. Exclude Christianity because of the association between Jesus and alcohol, or Jesus and a bad childhood association??? Was the writer on crack? That is like thinking no Jew should drive a BMW or Mercedes because it is a German car.
chamblee54 Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:24 pm
No I am not on crack. I am not saying we should exclude jesus worship, although I wouldn’t miss it. Jesus is a source of misery in my life. Jesus is verbal abuse, humiliation, ruined friendships, and ego tripping loudmouths. Right now, we have alcohol free potlucks out of consideration for men in recovery. I was raising the point that we should consider a “jesus free” potluck out of consideration for men who are likewise in recovery.
I feel that the tone of your reply is indicative of the aggressive, thoughtless nature of many jesus worshipers. Jesus worship is no ordinary religion. No other religion stirs the ill will that jesus worship does. Many of us have been hurt very badly because of jesus worship and jesus, and we should be careful when introducing this poison into our fellowship.
As for the issue of whether a Jew should drive a German car…this is not a car club. If a Jew doesn’t want to drive a German car, or a Korean does not want a Japanese car, that should be their privilege. Likewise, if I do not want to be confronted with an offensive religion, that should be my privilege.
chamblee54 Thu Oct 20, 2005 10:24 am
Here are a few more thoughts on the jesus issue, while I am waiting for the crack house to open
1- Is the problem jesus or jesus worshipers? A lot of the comments I have seen, both recently and in the “real” world, like to make excuses for jesus and place the blame entirely on jesus worshipers. Could it be that the problem is jesus? What do we mean when we say jesus? Is it the historic figure in the bible, or a vague spirit that lives in the hearts of people, and is different for all believers? When we blame jesus worshipers rather than jesus, are we contributing to the conflict between believer and non believer? In my opinion (overpriced at two cents) jesus is the problem. Many jesus worshipers are good people who have put their faith in an overrated spirit.
2- Does the first commandment forbid bible worship and jesus worship? Should this matter to us? You are all intelligent men. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t be reading this. You can decide this for yourself.
3- Arguments about jesus are not spiritually fulfilling. In fact, they are painful and unpleasant, and lead to much ill will between neighbors, and ill will for jesus.
4- I like the fact that this is a men group, and I do not have to use gender inclusive language.
5- One of you writes “run away from it, hide and try to banish any mention of it from your existence”. If only it were that simple. One of the problems with many jesus worshipers is that they simply will not shut up. They are like dogs that will not quit barking. While I am not saying we should never say the j word, I would suggest that we show some sensitivity to those of us who are allergic to jesus.
6- Islam is a very close second to jesus worship in terms of generating obnoxious behavior, and may in fact be worse. It should also be noted that two wrongs do not make a right. Also, if the first commandment outlaws bible worship, would it not include the quaran as well?
7- While I am discussing the ten commandments, Let’s talk about the third. This is about the use of sacred names. The third commandment is a lot more than gods last name. The g word should be used with kindness and reverence, or not at all. The third commandment does not include a pledge of allegiance to a nationalist symbol.
8- What do we mean by “all spiritual paths”? A jihad ? Doorknob worship? Pastafarianism (noodle worship)? Could alcohol use be considered a spiritual path? After all it does involve spirits. And, we have already banished this from our gatherings, out of respect for those in recovery. Do we really need those seven words (that is open to all spiritual paths.) in the mission statement? “We are committed to creating safe, sacred space for loving gay men to explore and strengthen our spiritual identity”…. Do we really need to gild the lily by adding on to that? Also, if we introduce elements into our gathering that are offensive to some of our neighbors…like alcohol and jesus…do we compromise the safety and sacredness of the space?
9- Just one more line, and this is a top ten list.
10- Last summer I led a ritual, where some of our guest were the four gods and the seven goddesses. The seven goddesses are Isis, Astarte, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Iana, Diana. The four gods are jesus, buddah, mohammed, and elvis. Jesus was very well behaved and did not cause any trouble.
XL Catch 22 This chapter is where the story gets downright far fetched. Colonels Korn and Cathcart offer Yossarian a deal. Instead of a court martial, they send him home. The only thing Yossarian has to do is like the two slimy bastards. The deal is odious. Yossarian accepts the deal.
As Yossarian walks out of the meeting, he encounters Nately’s whore, dressed as a Private. She lunges at him, and stabs him in the side.
PG collects quotes for use in compilations. Many, though not all, are from facebook. Here are a few, with one from Chapter forty included.
I like someone who is as proud of his ability to listen as he is the clever things that he says.(fb)
G-d is in the details
Really dreading the flurry of obligatory niceties tomorrow. I appreciate being acknowledged, but what I’d REALLY like is for people to want to do stuff with me, and to want that enough to try to make such plans ahead of time such that it might conceivably happen. Figuring out my very consistent schedule would be a nice touch too. I probly won’t respond to birthday wishes tomorrow. I’ll be too busy trying really hard to actually have that happy birthday, despite it being a day full of doctor’s appointments for me and mine, leading up to a weekend of missing out on various fun things for lack of funds. And having a bunch of randomly occurring bullshit phone conversations where I act happy that somebody’s automatic reminder function prompted them to fulfill a perceived social obligation would make my birthday a lot less fun for me. If I’m not worth spending time with in real life, please just don’t even bother with a cheerful birthday greeting. (fb)
Wie wil het nou niet? Erotisch contact met honderden of zelfs duizenden vrouwen, mannen en stellen. Iedereen toch? Voor de lekkerste dates zit je dan ook goed bij ons.
“The men were perfectly content to fly as many missions as we asked them as long as they thought they had no alternative. Now you’ve given them hope, and they’re unhappy. So the blame is all yours.”
“I hope you don’t have friends who recommend Ayn Rand to you. The fiction of Ayn Rand is as low as you can get re fiction. I hope you picked it up off the floor of the subway and threw it in the nearest garbage pail. She makes Mickey Spillane look like Dostoevsky.” ~Flannery O’Connor (fb)
“Thanks for taking time out of your busy booger-eating schedule to comment..” ~ My favorite retort to a comments board troll. (fb)
Today i received a phone call from my bank stating my identity had been stolen. I asked them how they knew, and they said because my credit score went up. (fb)
Before I closed the word file, the machine asked me: “Save changes to The Perfect Church “?
This web page at http://www.awkwardboners.com has been reported as an attack page and has been blocked based on your security preferences.
WHAT IF instead of exhausting our finances on church ski trips we wore holes in our pants on church knee trips?
My unfavorite phrase is mainstream media, or msm. It doesn’t anger me so much as it makes me lose respect for the person who uses it. If this person works for Cox Enterprises or News Corporation, and they complain about MSM, then they are talking about themselves. News Corporation, the parent of Fox news, is as mainsteam as it is possible to be.
XLI Snowden Yossarian wakes up in the hospital. Two doctors are threatening to commit surgery, over what is apparently a minor wound. After that crisis is over, Yossarian tells the Chaplain about his deal. The man of G-d is horrified.
Soon, Yossarian is by himself, in the dark, nasty hospital. There is no one to tell him the time. As Catcher in the rye readers know, this tells us that Nurse Duckett is not there. Soon, Yossarian falls asleep, and begins to dream about the mission where Snowdon is killed.
Soon, the blood and guts are flying everywhere. Yossarian tries to help Snowden in his misery, but makes one dumb mistake after another. One of the themes of this book is that none of the deaths were because of enemy competence. Every American who dies in this story does so because of stupidity and mistakes on the part of the allies. The Vietnam expression was friendly fire.
“He felt goose pimples clacking all over him as he gazed down despondently at the grim secret Snowden had spilled all over the messy floor. It was easy to read the message in his entrails. Man was matter, that was Snowden’s secret. Drop him out a window and he’ll fall. Set fire to him and he’ll burn. Bury him and he’ll rot, like other kinds of garbage. The spirit gone, man is garbage. That was Snowden’s secret. Ripeness was all. “
A few months ago, a young man went into a store in Southwest Atlanta. When he left, he was attacked by three men. The incident was taped by a fourth man, who kept yelling “no faggots in jack city”. The video was posted on the internet, and became the sensation of the day. Later, the attackers were arrested, and some “community leaders” were calling for leniency. Here are some comments floating around the innertubes.
Lets be honest here, The Brandon was not permanently injured and the word is that Brandon knew those guys and possibly had an affair with one or more of the “attackers”. They were upset because they were about to be exposed on being on the “down low”. (Being on the “down low” in Atlanta is so COMMON that it is a trend going out of style,) 5 yrs prison and 5yrs parole is WAY more than enough. Lets put this to sleep and keep it moving. The gay rights people shoved the case down our throats enough
If Brandon White were beaten by a group of white thugs, those same Reps would be calling for a lifetime of imprisonment. But no. Because the thugs were from the hood, “leaders” beg for leniency.
i knew all this was a hoax anyway. this is atlanta were talking about, where it seems nearly all of the black men either are openly gay or secretly taking it in the ass. either way, it’s still fruity as hell, and they can all go somewhere with their sweet asses!!!! this is a non issue. there are more important issues in the black community than 3 down low ass niggas beating down a fruity ass nigga simply because he wants to expose their double lifestyles. atlanta is something else!!!!
Ok, Jay. You’re right. Put them in jail for 10 years and forget about them. They’re just young black men, anyway, right?
XLII Yossarian This is it. Chapter forty two is named for the hero, and is the last chapter. The last sentence is “The knife came down, missing him by inches, and he took off.” Nately’s whore will not give up, and once again she almost cops Yossarian’s life.
Yossarian is talking to the Major Danby. Yossarian wants to renege on the deal, which he finds odious. There are serious doubts on whether or not the Colonels would go through with their end of the bargain. They were never given the chance.
After a while, the Chaplain bursts into the conversation. It seems like Orr is alive. When last heard from, his boat was not rescued after a plane crash. It turns out that Orr has rowed his little boat from the Italian coast to a safe haven. In Sweden. This is about as believable as the repeated appearance of Nately’s whore at the base. .
Yossarian is inspired by the epic voyage of Orr, and decides to emulate it. He is going to go AWOL, go to Rome, and find his way to Sweden. Or somewhere. He will not let the German Army, the American Army, The Russian Army, or the British Army from stopping him. Major Danby tries to discourage him, while the Chaplain cheers him on. Finally, he steps out of the hospital, dodges one last attempted murder by Nately’s whore, and the book is over.
This is a rather unsatisfactory end. One gets the feeling that Mr. Heller was spinning this long tale of wartime insanity, and needed to find a way to end it. There is a sequel, Closing Time: The Sequel to Catch-22. The twice divorced Yossarian is living in New York, and hangs out with Milo Minderbinder.
This may have been the longest book reading ever for PG. The previous longest was Infinite Jest, which kept getting renewed at the library. After taking twelve weeks to go 600 pages, PG gave up. Just because you like to read, that doesn’t mean you like to carve faces out of stone.
The situation with Catch 22 is a bit different. This is a book that should be taken slowly, to appreciate the atmosphere and use of language. What really slowed PG down was reading with one eye. For the last two months, reading has meant letting the right eye outshine the fuzz from the left eye. There was an eye doctor appointment yesterday, and that situation is looking much better. No treatment was given yesterday, and in another month we will see what we see. The fact that insurance has decided not to pay for the office visits takes a bit of the joy away.
It is not known whether, or not, PG will attempt another book appreciation like this one. The odds are that eventually the hassle of putting this thing together will fade away, and another multi part book report will appear in Chamblee54.
This is part six of an appreciation of Catch 22. Parts one, two, three, four, five, and seven precede it. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This was written like Isaac Asimov.
XXXI Mrs. Daneeka “Dear Mrs., Mr., Miss, or Mr. and Mrs. Daneeka: Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father, or brother was killed, wounded, or reported missing in action.”
This was a letter sent to the wife of Dr. Daneeka, who was believed to be on board the plane that McWatt ran into a mountain. His presence around the base was not sufficient to disprove the rumors of his demise. He became a non person.
Dr. Daneeka wrote his wife, who was overjoyed to hear he was alive. She wrote him back. The letter was returned unopened, with a rubber stamp saying “killed in action”. There was insurance money, social security money, VA money, and more insurance money. Mrs. Daneeka took the children, and moved to Lansing MI. There was no forwarding address.
When you select the quote at the top of this chapter, you are given the option to google the selected phrase. One of the results is a page called love and marriage. It is a list of jokes.
My wife and I were happy for 20 years! … then … we met … Rodney Dangerfield
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.
Don’t marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. Scottish Proverb
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn’t, they’d be married too.
H. L. Mencken
A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle.
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?” She said, “Somewhere I have never been!” I told her, “How about the kitchen?”
When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws.
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, “Am I too late for the garbage?” Following her down the street I yelled, “No, jump in!”
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?” The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?” The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”
XXXII Yo-Yo’s Roomies This is another chapter where not much goes on. Yossarian gets four kids to live in his tent. They have not been around to war long enough to be bitter and cynical. This is very annoying to Yossarian. He goes to Rome in dispair.
There has been a document on PG’s desktop since July. It is titled “aspen ideas”. It seems that every summer, a bunch of people go to Colorado to have an intellectual conference. Andrew Sullivan, bless his heart, tipped off PG to the existence of this affair. “I had to go to the elite self-love festival when I was working at the Atlantic. I couldn’t breathe and couldn’t sleep for three days because of the altitude and kept bumping into people I’d trashed on the blog. Good times.”
Another sullipost was about Iran. “So this year I again missed the Aspen Ideas Festival; and it’s a bit of a shame. Had I gone I would have been deeply reassured (once again) about the extraordinarily safe global security environment in which the United States resides.
Case in point: this little nugget from Nicholas Burns — a former under secretary of state for political affairs at State Department, U.S. ambassador to NATO and State Department spokesman. Burns is a pretty bright guy and highly respected. Still in a discussion with Jeff Goldberg, Burns was asked who the United States’ number-one adversary in the world is, Burns’s reply: “Iran.” Goldberg responded, “No doubt in your mind?” Burns said, “None.”
Whew, now that is a relief! If Burns is correct that Iran is America’s number one adversary in the world then truly the United States has little to worry about. Iran is a second rate military power, lacks an active nuclear program, is deeply isolated in the Middle East, has a poorly performing economy and has few allies or friends. In short, Iran is the hottest of hot messes.”
Meanwhile, the Aspen Ideas Festival is now accepting deposits for the 2013 event. As one slide on the site says, the time for BS and slogans is over. And the 2012 shindig is immortalized on twitter.
@NPRdeabs “You’re only as needy as your unmet needs”-Amir Levine #AspenIdeas So true…
@thisfarmingman Heading to the Belly Up to see Moby in concert…
@darrwest Seems wrong that I luxuriate at #aifestival while 800,000 in @DC have no power or AC. As sign of solidarity, I will turn off my AC.
@KBAndersen One reason to come to the Aspen Ideas Festival: you’re @AnneKreamer, you wear your Tory Burch dress, & @toryburch says you look great in it.
@kjpilot Early yoga at #AspenIdeas with @Quaker coach Bob Harper. Mountains in back, oatmeal in @pepsico tent as reward. Heaven pic.twitter.com/q98KZxdv
XXXIII Nately’s Whore Yossarian goes to Rome looking for pussy. He winds up helping Nately rescue his gf from some obnoxious officers. Nately’s whore then sleeps for eighteen hours, and falls in love with Nately. He shows his appreciation by trying to get her to quit hustling, which she does not appreciate. It is a fun chapter, with very little bloodshed for a war story.
There is a blogger in Florida named Adam Heath Avitable. He weighs 400 pounds, give or take a hundred pounds, and he does stand up comedy. He recently took questions from his readers, which are much more numerous than the readers of Chamblee54. PG decided it would be fun to take these questions, and give his own answers.
This is one of those post ideas that did not work out. A few of the questions yielded moderately funny answers, but most of them drew blanks. None of the questions were as funny as the picture Avitable used to have. It showed a German Staff car, with Adolph Hitler and Adam Heath Avitable in the back seat. The caption was that Avitable was where tact went to die.
BTW, apparently Adolph Hitler did not have a middle name. With the notoriety that he achieved, it was a shame that he only had two names. It would have made him sound so much more criminal if he had a middle name. The other great European megalomaniac, Napoleon Bonaparte, also went through life with only two names.
Mark asked:“What tragedy happened to you that made you so funny? Did you happen to grow up near Penn State by chance?”
No, PG grew up near Oglethorpe University. It has lots of granite buildings, and a half finished football stadium on Peachtree Road. William Randolph Hearst bought a degree from them for $100k and 400 acres of land.
The source of that fact is a memoir by Marion Davies. When PG tried to buy the book, it did not have a price marked on it. It was a Hearst Castle Souvenir. Book Nook charges a percentage of the original price, and was confused. They charged him $1.60.
Nuala Reilly asked: “Okay, several questions just because I’m curious like that: 1. Favourite movie. Or top five in case you can’t pick just one like me. 2. Favourite stand up comic- who is your idol? 3. Dream job-if you could do ANYTHING and make a living at it… 4. Favourite swear (that one is just for fun) 5. Reason you got into blogging.”
1-Vanishing Point. 2- Lester Maddox was the favorite comic, but he was not an idol. 3- shabbos goy (spell check suggestion:shabby gory) 4- Oliver Cromwell used to say “by the bowels of Christ”. 5- having pointless arguments with Christians.
Lester Maddox was the punch line of a joke once, and only one person caught on. The idea was you should change your facebook picture to a cartoon character from your childhood. PG put up a picture of Lester Garfield Maddox. Governor Maddox was the Lester of two evils.
Coal Miner’s Granddaughter asked: “What did you do with the hair you shaved from your head? Why did you go to law school and not take the bar? What moment in your life gifted you with clarity about your purpose? What moment in your life made your gut wrench and caused you to wonder about your true purpose? Why are we friends?”
PG throws old hair away. He thinks lawyers are icky people. As for clarity of porpoise, you will have to ask flipper. The gut wrench was from eating too many z burgers at Zestos. Because facebook says so.
Poppy asked: “I know you’ve gone through a lot of big life changes lately. Are you planning to leave Florida, or are you staying for the foreseeable future?”
PG is staying in Georgia for a while. Florida is too hot, and those killer skittles are scary.
Diddy asked: “Why does it hurt when I pee?”
You forgot to pull the feathers out.
Jana asked: “What the fuck?”
What is “the fuck”?
XXXIV Thanksgiving This is a chapter with drugs and violence. Milo gets the men roaring drunk on Thanksgiving. Someone decides to start firing a machine gun for fun. Yossarian goes to permanently stop them. Nately tries to stop Yossarian, who breaks Nately’s nose.
The next day, Yossarian goes to the hospital to see Nately. He finds the Chaplain there, the man of G-d having lied to get in the hospital. The Chaplain is overjoyed with his humanity. All is well until the man in white appears, which freaks out one and all.
Nurse Duckett has decided to marry a doctor, and quit entertaining Yossarian. She is concerned about Dunbar, and warns Yossarian that Dunbar is about to be “disappeared” This leads to this quote, “It doesn’t make sense. It isn’t even good grammar. What the hell does it mean to disappear somebody?”
Maybe it is time for a tribute to the fine facility of Wikiquotes. They have quotes from all types of sources, and often will tell you the source. They even have sections about quotes, that are charitably referred to as disputed.
A few days ago, PG found a brightly colored document called Seven Brilliant Quotes. Knowing the dubious veracity of internet knowledge, PG decided to investigate. A two part series was the result. In the end, only two of the SBQ had clear cut sources. The other five are probably fabrications.
Wikiquotes proved to be invaluable. One of the quotes was from Abraham Lincoln. You wouldn’t think anyone would lie about honest Abe, do you? Well, think again. The chapter on Mr. Lincoln was 43,444 words long. A festive forest of fecal fours. PG copied those words into a document, and did a search for “friendship”. The quote on the poster did not show up. It is not known if Mr. Lincoln really said ” I hope these are good seats tonight.”
When you go to the Wikiquotes home page, you get a quote of the day. Here is the message for today. It is from “Ivan Illich (4 September 1926 – 2 December 2002) was an Austrian-born Christian anarchist, author, polymath, and polemicist.” Leo Tolstoy did not write a short story about him.
“Machines which ape people are tending to encroach on every aspect of people’s lives, and that such machines force people to behave like machines. The new electronic devices do indeed have the power to force people to “communicate” with them and with each other on the terms of the machine. Whatever does not fit the logic of machines is effectively filtered from a culture dominated by their use.
The machine-like behaviour of people chained to electronics constitutes a degradation of their well-being and of their dignity which, for most people in the long run, becomes intolerable. Observations of the sickening effect of programmed environments show that people in them become indolent, impotent, narcissistic and apolitical. The political process breaks down, because people cease to be able to govern themselves; they demand to be managed.”
XXXV Milo The Militant This chapter begins with pathos, meanders through insipid satire, and ends with a punch to the solar plexus. At first, Nately wants to fly more missions, so he can continue to see his prostigirlfriend. Then Milo pretends to volunteer to fly combat missions, and Colonel Cathcart sincerely does not let him.
The last paragraph is where the power is. The men fly a mission, and there is flak. Dobbs makes a mistake, and rams his plane into another one. Both planes go down, and everyone on both planes is killed. Nately is one of the casualties.
In the movie, Nately was played by Art Garfunkel. This was right after “Bridge over Troubled Waters” was recorded, and Paul Simon wanted to go make a lot of money. It annoyed Mr. Simon for that Mr. Garfunkel went to Mexico to make a movie.
Art Garfunkel is sort of a strange person. He used to go walking across America, with a van waiting for him at the end of the day. If he was going by a cattle pasture, he would stop and talk to the cows.
A man named T.J. Holmes got pulled over recently. Here are the tweets.
@tjholmes Driving while black ain’t no joke! http://instagr.am/p/NtNk4mt9Xg/
@tjholmes Yep, in sitting on the side of the road 1 mile from my house with 2 cop cars behind me.
@tjholmes Officer has yet to give a reason for why he stooped me.
@tjholmes This is a damn shame. Officer is literally stumbling over his words trying to explain why he stopped me.
@tjholmes Officer’s reason for pulling me over: “wanted to make sure you have insurance on the car.” I kid you not.
@tjholmes Well guys, I managed to avoid jail time. However, my relationship with ____ County police may have just soured a bit. #showmeyourpapers
@tjholmes Still pissed beyond words right now. But Lord knows I’m not the only this will happen to today. #showmeyourpapers
XXXVI The Cellar The Chaplain is devastated by the death of Nately. As he is dealing with the tragedy, a hand lands on his shoulder. A person, supposedly a superior officer, says “Come along. . . . You’d better come along with us, Father. . . . We’re from the government. We want to ask you a few questions.” They did not add, we are here to help.
Chaplain Tappman soon finds himself in a kangaroo court. He is not told what he is accused of, except for stealing a cherry tomato. This was twenty years before the Miranda case, and that doesn’t apply to the military anyway. After a while, the interrogators have had their fun, and the Chaplain is let go. Apparently, someone doesn’t like the Chaplain, and wants to make trouble.
This is disturbing for anyone who has ever tried to convince the authorities that he is innocent. PG has been in a few kangaroo courts, and read this chapter with horror.
Where did we get the phrase kangaroo court? Here is one story. This page is sponsored by an ad, for a service enabling you to See anyone’s arrest record.
“Kangaroo courts are sham legal proceedings which are set-up in order to give the impression of a fair legal process. In fact, they offer no impartial justice as the verdict, invariably to the detriment of the accused, is decided in advance. Such courts are associated with groups who have found a need to dispense a rough and ready form of justice but are, temporarily at least, outside the bounds of formal judicial processes; for example, inmates in jail, soldiers at war, settlers of lands where no jurisdiction has yet been established.
The origin of ‘kangaroo court’ is unknown, although, given that kangaroos are native nowhere else, we might expect the term to have originated in Australia. As always, a lack of a definite origin encourages speculative claims, which may be an appropriate word in this context as one frequently repeated supposed derivation relates to ‘claim jumping’ in the California Gold Rush – hence the allusion to kangaroos. That’s quite a plausible notion. Kangaroos and their claim to fame, so to speak, i.e. jumping, were known in the USA by the early 1800s, so there’s no reason to limit the derivation to Australia. Also, the earliest known citation of the term is American and appears in a collection of magazine articles by Philip Paxton (the pen name of Samuel Adams Hammett), which were published in 1853 under the title of A stray Yankee in Texas: “By a unanimous vote, Judge G– was elected to the bench and the ‘Mestang’ or ‘Kangaroo Court’ regularly organized.”
The natural inclination to want to base the phrase in Australia has led to suggestions that the vacant stares of kangaroos when meeting humans for the first time were mimicked by jury members in court. There’s no evidence to support this, or any other Australian derivation, and it seems highly speculative.
The claim jumping derivation though has the feel of a ‘trying to hard’ explanation that is the stamp of folk etymology. The supposed wordplay of linking kangaroos and jumping is appealing but isn’t really necessary to explain this phrase. Kangaroo courts courts were also called ‘mustang courts’ in the USA (see above). Allusions to the unsophisticated natures of wild animals are frequent in the metaphorical coinage of phrases that apply to things that are considered inferior or ersatz. We have dog Latin, dog’s breakfast, horse-faced and many others. It seems probable that the reference to mustangs (half-wild horses) and kangaroos came about by that same route.”
Welcome to part two of the Chamblee54 due diligence report on the Seven Brilliant Quotes. In part one, we checked out the first three. At no time was a source for the quote found. All three are suspect, with “misunderstanding” indicated in the Albert Einstein quote. It is amazing how quickly accepted these sayings are by the inspiration hungry public.
The seven quotes, in a copy friendly format, are:
William Shakespeare – Never play with the feelings of others because you may win the game but the risk is that you will surely lose the person for a life time.
Napoleon Bonaparte – The world suffers a lot. Not because of the violence of bad people, but because of the silence of good people.
Albert Einstein – I am thankful to all those who said NO to me. Its because of them I did it myself.
Abraham Lincoln – If friendship is your weakest point then you are the strongest person in the world.
Martin Luther King Jr. – We must learn to live together as brothers or we will perish together as fools.
Mohandas Gandhi – The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Dr. Abdul Kalam – It is very easy to defeat someone, but it is very hard to win someone.
Getting back to business, did Abraham Lincoln say “If friendship is your weakest point then you are the strongest person in the world.” There are lots of links to this quote, in a variety of fonts and colors. Some have spectacular photography in the background. However, none of these links has a source for this quote, or any indication of the context.
Wikiquotes has 43,444 words about Abraham Lincoln. PG copied these words, and did a search for the word “friendship”. There were three quotes.
The better part of one’s life consists of his friendships. Letter to Joseph Gillespie 13 July 1849.
By such things the feelings of the best citizens will become more or less alienated from it, and thus it will be left without friends, or with too few, and those few too weak to make their friendship effectual.
The Lyceum Address 1838
A civil war occurring in a country, where foreigners reside and carry on trade under treaty stipulations is necessarily fruitful of complaints of the violation of neutral rights. All such collisions tend to excite misapprehensions, and possibly to produce mutual reclamations between nations which have a common interest in preserving peace and friendship. Second State of the Union address 1862.
This type of research can be frustrating. Being inspired by beautiful words can give you strength and purpose. It can also make you feel foolish, when the lovely words are revealed to be lies. Being a cynic gets lonely. Children of all ages don’t like to be told that there is no Santa Claus.
The good news is that number five is for real. Martin Luther King gave a speech at Western Michigan University in 1963. There is a probably his standard speech, given many times. The second section of the speech is “Call for action.”
“The world in which we live is geographically one. Now we are challenged to make it one in terms of brotherhood. Now through our ethical and moral commitment, we must make of it a brotherhood. We must all learn to live together as brothers or we will perish together as fools. This is the great challenge of the hour. This is true of individuals. It is true of nations. No individual can live alone. No nation can live alone.”
“I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. You can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality. [W]e’re challenged after working in the realm of ideas, to move out into the arena of social action and to work passionately and unrelentingly to make racial justice a reality.”
“[W]e must never substitute a doctrine of Black supremacy for white supremacy. For the doctrine of Black supremacy is as dangerous as white supremacy. God is not interested merely in the freedom of black men and brown men and yellow men but God is interested in the freedom of the whole human race, the creation of a society where all men will live together as brothers.”
PG has written about the problem of quoting Mohandas Gandhi before. Supposedly he said “I love your Christ, but I dislike your Christianity.” PG thinks this is a fabrication.
The quote on the poster is “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Wikiquotes has a link to Collected Works of Mahatma Gandhi Online. The next stop is page 302 of this section. Mr. Gandhi gave an “Interview to the press” in Karachi, on March 26, 1931. A freedom fighter named Bhagat Singh had been executed by the British three days earlier.
Do you not think it impolitic to forgive a government which has been guilty of a thousand murders?
I do not know a single instance where forgiveness has been found so wanting as to be impolitic.
But no country has ever shown such forgiveness as India is showing to Britain?
That does not affect my reply. What is true of individuals is true of nations. One cannot forgive too much. The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
The bottom line is from Dr. Abdul Kalam. (The name is misspelled on the poster.) The phrase is “It is very easy to defeat someone, but it is very hard to win someone.” Many viewers have no idea who this person is. Once again, Wikiquotes comes to the rescue. “Dr. Avul Pakir Jainulabdeen Abdul Kalam (born 15 October 1931) Indian scientist and engineer; 11th President of India; generally referred to as Dr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam.” The quotes are from Wings of Fire: An Autobiography of APJ Abdul Kalam.
A search for the word “defeat” did not show results. A search for “win” shows a few.
“the best way to win was to not need to win. The best performances are accomplished when you are relaxed and free of doubt.” (p. 31) “Happiness, satisfaction, and success in life depend on making the right choices, the winning choices. There are forces in life working for you and against you. One must distinguish the beneficial forces from the malevolent ones and choose correctly between them.” (p. 106)
“Life is a difficult game. You can win it only by retaining your birthright to be a person. And to retain this right, you will have to be willing to take the social or external risks involved in ignoring pressures to do things the way others say they should be done.” (p. 176)
The phrase on the poster also credited to John Keats. There is also the story of the student who argues with an atheist professor, and ultimately wins. The student is sometimes said to be Albert Einstein. In this version, Argumnent : What, Who is GOD?, the coda is “This seems to be a true story, and the student was none other than APJ Abdul Kalam, the former President of India “.
The research for part one consisted of entering the quote into a search engine. It was not until the Lincoln investigation that the method of copying wikiquote, and searching for a key word, was discovered. Out of a sense of fairness, the first three quotes will be investigated using this method.
For William Shakespeare, the search word was risk. There were no results. For Napoleon Bonaparte, the search word was violence. There was one result. “There is no such thing as an absolute despotism; it is only relative. A man cannot wholly free himself from obligation to his fellows. A sultan who cut off heads from caprice, would quickly lose his own in the same way. Excesses tend to check themselves by reason of their own violence. What the ocean gains in one place it loses in another. ” For Albert Einstein, the search word was thankful. There were no results.
So, there are seven quotes in the motivational poster. Only two of the seven have a apparent source.
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.