Cadaver Calculator

Posted in Undogegorized by chamblee54 on August 14, 2008

When you don’t have anything to say, you can take a test.
There are lots of online quizzes now. Tonight it is
The Cadaver Calculator…Find out how much your body is worth When I was a kid, there were studies showing how the chemical value of the average human being was $4.20, not adjusted for inflation.
A few years later, I was in a place called camp K. It was a moonie place, although they didn’t tell us that. They had lectures, and one was about G-d. It finally came down to
G-d being the difference between $4.20 in chemicals and a human being.
This quiz does not refer to being reduced to component chemicals. As the fine print says
So you’ve bitten the big one and instead of pushing up daisies your loved ones decided it would be best to sell your body to science. This survey will tell you approximately how much money they’d get for it. Cadaver values are primarily based on overall health and the level of interest your corpse holds to the medical research industry.

So I go to the quiz. It is pretty standard health stuff…do you drink or smoke, are you overweight, and are you exposed to noxious chemicals. There are a few surprises, and they quiz does not let on how they affect the overall score. It has been a while since anyone asked if I was an albino. ( I did go to high school with one). The quiz also wants to know if you are tall, and how long is your hair. Maybe a wig maker is investing in this.
So you answer question twenty, and await the result. First you have the pulsating full screen ad for
Mingle2, a Completely Free Online Dating Site
There is small print at the bottom of the pulsating ad for you to bypass the dating site and get the results of your test. And the results are ( kill the drum roll please)
Congratulations, your dead body is worth $4725!Doesn’t that make you feel great?

Wednesday the Thirteenth

Posted in Undogegorized by chamblee54 on August 13, 2008

Wednesday the thirteenth was the monthly meeting of the Atlanta bloggers group. It had been eleven months since I made one, and sometimes you just have to get out of the house.
The night can be divided into three parts. The first was the drive into town. The freeway was crowded and scary, with lanes disappearing and beemers refusing to let you get over. This is to be expected. I got off at Williams street, and was doing pretty good until I got to International Blvd. Turning left by the former bus station, I turned onto what I thought was Spring Street. Instead, I was going by the library and onto Forsyth. I turned by the gussied up Rialto, and wondered what on earth was so special about that building. Going down past the Olympic park and the omni complex, I found a street that seemed correct to turn onto. A couple of turns down increasingly desolate streets put me in front of the Elliot street pub, the scene of the festivities. I was past it before I knew what was going on, and had to go back around the block. The street names seemed to change from the last time I had been on those streets just a minute before. Finally I found Elliot street, and saw a parking spot on the street that did not have a no parking sign.

The second part of the evening was pretty neat. The Elliot Street Pub was a classic little joint, with lots of cool stuff on the wall to look at. There was a tv behind the bar, with the scrolling words on the screen. The scrolling words were comparing Michael Phelps to Tiger Woods. I decided not to look at that anymore.
David was the first person to greet me, followed by Lori. I made my way to the bar, and the bartender agreed to make a pot of coffee for me. That is the reason I am typing these notes now instead of going to sleep.
I stood in front of the carved wooden man and took in the scene. Duane was discussing his counter tops. David was talking about the Olympics, and a discussion ensued about what events were in the Decathlon. I wandered over to the side, and talked to Mr. and Mrs. Chutney about Frank Zappa and bands that don’t do well in concert. The napkin began to be passed around, only this time it was on solid paper. The medium is the message. Before long, the blogging crowd was leaving, and I left my third cup of coffee unfinished on a bar.
Outside, I formally introduced myself to Duane, and listened to him and Chutney discuss life in East Atlanta.

Then the third, and least pleasant, part of the evening started. I sort of know my way around downtown, and the plan was to find a street that would lead me to Piedmont. I wound up on Trinity, which worked well until it got to the deadend at Memorial with no street light. Little did I know that a Braves game had just let out, and there was a non stop line of cars going past me on Memorial. I had to turn around in the other lane on Trinity and go back towards Peachtree.
I found Peachtree, and dashed into an intersection when the light changed to get in front of a long line of cars. I went up Peachtree until I got to Fifth, where I made my move to get to Piedmont. There is a house on Fifth Street that is playing revolving restaurant…a new place will open, go bankrupt, and then someone else will try his luck. The current occupant of the building had a red neon sign that seemed to say STRAIT. That is not a good name for a business on that street.
So I turn onto Piedmont, and when I pass tenth street the rain starts. Hard. Very Hard. I go past the park, and see signs saying that the two right lanes would be closed ahead. The street was condensed to two lanes, and the sky was falling in. I made it to Cheshire Bridge and turned right. Surely by the time I get to Buford Hiway things will be better. Again I am wrong. Buford Hiway is being repaved, and is down to two lanes. I am behind a Marta Bus, and it is raining cats and dogs. I get to Clairmont and slide around the bus when the turn arrow comes on. Through extreme familiarity with the intersection I can find the lane to go north. At this point the rain becomes less intense, and I got home intact.
Somehow, I285 won’t seem so bad later this morning.

The Russians are Coming

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 12, 2008

Some of the reports coming back from the new conflict are disturbing.
It seems like some Georgians thought the USA was going to come to their rescue. Georgia is a member of “ the coalition of the willing”, and thought it was going to be a member of NATO. If that had come to pass, the USA would be treaty bound to send troops to fight the Russians. As if our armed forces are ready for another battle. The war in Babylon has taken its toll.
How many other countries have we agreed to help if they anger their neighbor?
Some of the news reports from Russia openly blame America for this.
Before the shooting started, very few Americans were aware of the Russian-Georgian dispute. Out attention was distracted by the war in Babylon, an election, an economy in tatters, and Britney Spears.
Russia is getting bad press in this affair. They have a mighty army, and don’t seem to care what the rest of the world thinks. There are similarities with the American invasion of Iraq.

Atlantic Station

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 11, 2008

PG and his pal Uzi had used up all the good places for a sunday afternoon walk. Then Uzi suggested Atlantic Station.
The first stop on the tour was IKEA. PG had heard all the stories describing the place as a retail Hotel California…you can check in, but you cannot check out.
Uzi wanted to see the place, and there were a few spots left in the parking lot. Getting to these places was easier said than done, but after waiting for the vehicles in line to pick up merchandise, the Green Honda was in a space.
IKEA made PG feel so single. All those charming families in the midst of that abundant merchandise. After following the arrows through two levels, the two walkers were expelled into the sunshine.
There were two possible destinations ….the millennium gate, and the mosque. The more secular was chosen. The Millennium Gate gives new meaning to the phrase tacky. Then, the green metal statue honoring “Justice” was examined.
The next stop was the bridge over the freeway. First, there was a detour to the various shrines of retail splendor. An open air market was found. PG stopped to take a picture of a merchant, who waved his arms vigorously and screamed no. This was the cause of much speculation, with Uzi saying he was a fugitive and PG suspecting bootleg merchandise.
Before long, the pair was going down an escalator into a parking facility. There was a money taking box to allow you to pay for your parking. It seems like the whole place is on top of a parking garage. Uzi wondered what would happen when some otp visitors got beaten up by marauding urban teenagers in this garage. This is consistent with his opinion that Atlantic Station was the second coming of Underground Atlanta.
And so it goes. The bowling alley was rented out to a private party. The outfitter store was a glorified version of the gap. Construction was around every corner.
On the way back to IKEA, there was another green metal statue. The first guess was that it was dedicated to truth. After all, truth and justice go together everywhere except the courtroom. But alas, the green metal statue was in honor of peace.

Park and Shop

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 9, 2008

The postcard said free pizza.
Jill Chambers, the incumbent representative from the 81st district, had a campaign rally at Gallas Pizza. The pizza place was the former Park and Shop. It has been nicely redone, with almost all traces of the Park and Shop gone.

As soon as I arrived, I was greeted by Mrs. Chambers. I got to talk to her, and she said that she had read my blog. She agreed with my assessment of the democratic hopefuls.

I asked Mrs. Chambers what she wanted to do about water. She said that a comprehensive water plan had been passed in the house, but that it was a complicated issue. It was noted that the dozens of governments were competing for the development. If one municipality turned down a developer, it could go to a neighbor. Ultimately, no one wants to be responsible for the water supply.

Her guest at the rally was House Speaker Glenn Richardson. There was only one person wearing a tie, who I guess was working for the Speaker.

Before long, the pizza was served. I got a slice of something with sun dried tomatoes and pepperoni, sprinkled with powdered cheese. The pizza was good, and the soft drinks were free. I saw Mr. Richardson dispose of an empty beer bottle.

I was getting ready to leave, when Mrs. Chambers spoke to the crowd. Mr. Gallas was called out of the kitchen, and given a state flag. Mrs. Chambers and Mr. Richardson spoke to the crowd.
After the speech, I asked Mrs. Chambers how long the state flag would be good.

Eight Lines

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 8, 2008

Today is 080808. This first decayed decade of the new age has only one year left, so when we have 090909 that will be all. That will be two days before the eighth anniversary of 911. The Chinese think that 8 is a magic number. The Olympics started at 8:08 on 080808. I seldom watch tv, so an Olympic boycott is moot for me. The human rights abuses are really bad, but I keep on buying the product of those nasty factories. I just might be complicit. I hear the Chinese are leading lenders for our national debt. That might be like buying whiskey for an alcoholic. All of us are in the gutter, but some of us are looking at stars. Twelve years ago, the Olympics came to Atlanta. While not a perfect event, this was the nicest I have ever seen the people of this city. We went back to our nasty selves soon enough. Back to the number eight. It is a dandy digit. It is two cubed, and in some number systems is the same as 100. It is the infinity symbol at a ninety degree angle, and two hundred seventy degrees. With the advent of text messaging, 8 is a very handy symbol. It sounds just like “ate”. You can use it to say str8, c8ter, and m8. Isn’t that gr8?

The Perfect Church

Posted in Religion by chamblee54 on August 7, 2008

I was coming down Peachtree Dunwoody, towards the soccer fields, when the voice on the radio began to describe the storm damage. It seems as though “The Perfect Church” had taken a lightening hit on its steeple, setting off a spectacular fire. The concept of something called “The Perfect Church” being hit by lightening was just too amazing.
Before I wrote about it, I needed a bit more information. Google chose this time to let me know it would no longer work for me, at least through the front door. MSN search showed a few results for TPC, but nothing that helped.
The various news websites were no help. It was as if no one wanted to say the obvious…that a place boastful enough to call itself “The Perfect Church” had been hit by lightening. The closest I saw was a reference at venerable WSB that
“the Atlanta Fire Department is battling a steeple fire on a church believed caused by lightening at McDaniel St. and Ralph David Abernathy.”
Then, an unlikely source came to my aid. WGST is the home of Rush Limbaugh, and is known for its far right agenda. It has a google powered search option, which worked for me…unlike the main google page. It also has a music player, with a David Bowie concert from 1972. I doubt Rush Limbaugh was at that show, although he might have gotten some good pills there.
The google search did provide a link to “The Perfect Church” at 670 McDaniel Street. A visit to their site shows the words “Christians are Perfect!”. Maybe that lightening strike was intentional.
As I typed that last line, Mr. Bowie was performing “Space Oddity”. The line he sang as I leaned back after typing the last line was “
May G-d’s love be with you”.

History of Religion part one

Posted in Religion by chamblee54 on August 6, 2008

I was a southern baptist all my life. Arguably, I became a baptist when my mother converted in 1938, but really didn’t get with the program until I was born in 1954. The story is that Daddy called the choir director at six in the morning to sign me up.
First Baptist in Atlanta was a big church on Peachtree street ,about a mile north of downtown. (A few years ago, they sold the land to a developer and moved to the suburbs. I was working a block away when they tore down the building, and got some chips of brick as a souvenir.) I sang in the “cherub” choir. This was quite an experience when we performed in front of a full house. I have good memories of Sunday school, vacation bible school, and the choir program.
One thing I did not like, even at that young age, was the preacher. He was a greasy haired man who shouted a lot and had a mean streak. (Sounds like some of these bloggers). Years later, I heard persistent rumors that he was gay. ( I should note that this is not Charles Stanley. It is the man who preceded him)

There is one thing I will always remember. We were watching him preach, and he shouted, “this is the word of G-d” . He then waved a Bible in the air and slammed it into the pulpit. I thought, if that is the word of G-d, maybe he shouldn’t slam it down like that.

Around 1962, mom&dad decided to move to a church closer to home. I liked Briarcliff Baptist. About this time, I first heard about being “saved from sin”, and thought it was a pretty cool idea.
I also was in cub scouts, and since their meetings were the same day as choir practice, I quit the choir.
I attended church regularly the next few years, but never did join the church and get baptized. The custom of pressuring children to make a “commitment of faith”, and get baptized, reflects poorly on Jesus.
There are some other family issues that came up about this time. They are too personal to get into here, but they affected my attitude towards the church
After a while I was 17 years old, and working in a restaurant that was open until 1am on Saturday night. I decided one Sunday that I didn’t want to get up for church. I have only been back to that building once in the intervening 36 years.

Run Run Off Off

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 5, 2008

There is nothing to do at 4 in the morning, and yet there is everything. The only problem is staying awake at work all day, but I can fake that.
This is also election runoff day. In one hour and eight minutes, the polls will open. Maybe, just maybe, I can be the first person to vote at this precinct this morning. It might be quite the social scene waiting outside for the doors to open.
I have already had one first today. A blog hero just got back from a vacation cruise, and he had a selection of pictures. He is on a train into Manhattan as we type. I saw that no one had made a comment, so I went for it, and got in first:

I got up in the middle of the night and could not go back to sleep. After playing with the computer and eating, I decided to go grocery shopping. The store is really different at 4:30 in the morning, but I didn’t care. Then, there was the shocking discovery that my store did not have fresh corn. I had to go to another 24 hour Kroger to get my corn. This Kroger used to be an A&P. They tore down the A&P that had been there since 1960 and built a super big A&P. My mother shopped in the old A&P every Thursday afternoon for 36 years, until they tore it down to build a super big store. She went to the Kroger with no corn while this was happening. Then the new A&P was finished. My mother died a few months later, and within six weeks, A&P closed all the Atlanta stores. The supersize store became an all night Kroger, and they had fresh corn for me this morning.

Yea, the store was different. The stockerdudes were in the aisles putting product on the shelves. The only checkout available was the self scan, which I am trained on but not certified.
Leaving the Clairmont Kroger en route to the Brookhaven Kroger, I decided to see what am radio was like at four something in the morning. The first voice was talking about Skip Carey. As a non sports fan, I felt like an outsider at this. I do admit to admiration for Mr. Carey. Anyone that could watch all those Braves games in the 1980’s and not go postal was a strong man.
While I was on the computer earlier, I went to the Wikipedia page for Milo Hamilton. He was the Braves announcer when they first came to Atlanta, and I listened. Mr. Hamilton does not suffer from false modesty.
And so it goes. The runoff election will not be appealing. I have been following the Dekalb CEO race the last few days, and we seem to have a choice between Bill Campbell part two and Mr. Postcard. I will probably hold my nose. The voting is held in the cafetorium of my grammar school. I have held my nose in there before.
Spell check suggestions for this feature:
puntabulous- fabulousness, accountableness, accountability, nebulousness, insurmountably
wikipedia- pediatric, cyclopedia, hypermedia, stipendiary, impedimenta
cafetorium- crematorium, sanatorium, auditorium, moratorium, cafeteria

The BHO dilemma

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 3, 2008

The flapette continues about the postcard(s)
from the Stan Watson campaign. I am going to leave that to others to sort out. This incident does illustrate a problem with the BHO campaign.
In the “concerned citizens” postcard, Mr.Watson is boasting about his endorsement of BHO. He claims that he is trying to help elect an African American President. My question is, where does this leave a white voter?
The contest between BHO and JSM is showing signs of degenerating into a black vs. white campaign. This could only benefit JSM, and may indeed be his best chance to pull out this election.
BHO is walking a fine line. On the one hand, he needs to energize the African American vote. On the other hand, he cannot scare white people. It is going to be quite a balancing act.
Over the years, I have learned one thing.
When it is us against them, you need to remember which one you are. If the Black endorsements of BHO get too strident, this is going to scare white people. The wingnut end of the corporate media is already beating the drums for this. We saw this recently, when a mild comment about how ” I don’t look like the Presidents on the dollar bills ” was blown up into playing the race card from the bottom of the deck.
BHO is a sharp cookie, and he knows this. He recently said
“In no way do I think that John McCain’s campaign was being racist,” …”I think they’re cynical,” …”And I think they want to distract people from talking about the real issues.” Maybe we need a semantic microscope to explore the difference between racist and cynical.
BHO has run a remarkable, savvy campaign so far. The Repubs and their buddies in the corporate media are piling up mudballs to throw at him. He needs to do what he has done so far, and not let the mud stick. And his “supporters” should let go of his coattails.

Two Postcards

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on August 1, 2008

The runoff elections are next Tuesday. In Dekalb County, the CEO is running for the US Senate, and there is a race ( key word here) to determine who the next CEO will be.
Peach Pundit has compared the postcards sent out by Stan Watson. He is running against Burrel Ellis for the CEO position.
I live in a white neighborhood. I received a postcard from “Stan Watson for Dekalb CEO” , with a Wesley Chapel Road address. This postcard lists his website, the prosaic ( This was an issue with Cecillia Haley. She used a goofy web address, and left to her opponent to use as an attack site). The postcard is a fairly nondescript affair, with the usual homilies about building a better county. All the people endorsing Mr. Watson are white. Included in the endorsers is Karla Drenner, who is openly gay.
Apparently, the black neighborhoods are getting a different message. The postcard makes some confusing charges about Burrel Ellis. It seems like he favored black officials before he ran for CEO, but appointed white officials to different positions after the decision to run. ( One wonders how Mr. Ellis got in the position to appoint officials, if he was a mere district council representative)
The other charge that Mr. Watson makes against Mr. Ellis is that Mr. Ellis did not endorse Barack Obama. To quote from the postcard:
“ Stan Watson is one of the very first democrats in the state of Georgia to endorse Barack Obama in 2007 and has worked with Obama’s staff to ensure that he is elected the first African American President of the United States of America. Stan Watson was a part of the foundation that helped to anchor Barack Obama’s statewide victory and has the ties with Barack and Michelle Obama to make a difference in Dekalb County!”
The “Black” postcard does not show the Watson web address. The return address is “Concerned Dekalb Citizens”, with a Don Juan Lane address.
One wonders if BHO is aware of the coattail pulling by Mr. Watson. It is a mystery to this reporter what the race for POTUS has to do with collecting garbage in Lithonia.