Chamblee54

Weird The Rest Of The Story

Posted in Uncategorized by chamblee54 on April 30, 2010

This facility recently printed some commentary on the english language, courtesy of Gartalker. Here is part two, not to be confused with number two. Weird is spelled correctly…you can’t have weird without we. Pictures are from the ” Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”.
If all that wasn’t bad enough may I point out a few other basic flaws in our language that makes no sense to any one other than us

There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth, beeth? You have one goose, 2 geese; so one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Why doesn’t ‘Buick’ rhyme with ‘quick’

In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all.. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

Once I was in New England and I stopped at a Taco Bell because I actually wanted to taste something. Any thing that wasn’t boiled and maybe had just a little pepper on it. Any way by the time I had left ever kid in the place was saying, “Order that one more time Mr. We just love how you talk.” One girl asks me how long it took me to learn to talk that way. Yankees, you gotta love them.

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  1. […] the ” Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”. This is a repost. If all that wasn’t bad enough may I point out a few other basic flaws in our language that makes […]

  2. […] the “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”. This is a repost. If all that wasn’t bad enough may I point out a few other basic flaws in our language that makes […]


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