Chamblee54

#AbsurdObituaries

Posted in GSU photo archive, Undogegorized by chamblee54 on August 12, 2017


@Swalter255 He died in a freak accident, he and another freak ran into each other
@shellbell_xo Her stubborness killed her- She should have never said “Over my dead body.”
@farrfoxhake He died in most unusual circumstances: He was winning an argument with his wife. She’s now serving 20 for manslaughter.
@JennifersEyebr1
Nobody liked him, he was a grumpy selfish man and won’t be missed. – Love, your family

@JordanISaBEAR
She is survived by her pet hamster that subsisted on her flesh for ten days after her death.
@ESCapeditiea
When attending, we will offer complimentry wooden stakes and chainsaws. Just in case.
@ShotoDan2016 He was a dedicated bomb defusal expert. Even his Parkinson’s diagnosis couldn’t keep him from his job.
@loustweet Wanted man found in concrete vat. Called a ‘hardened criminal’ by police.

@twitsnotnice
Joe is survived by two cats, who at the time of his death, weren’t on speaking terms with him.
@TayBar80 Due to technical issues, the funeral has been moved next door to McDonalds parking lot.
@iwputt19 Restaurant in piece
@rhealyrhealy John had plenty of supplies to survive being trapped in his home for 7 days, but unfortunately, forgot to buy cat food.

@An_Enigma_2017 She died a horrid death when the green alien she coughed up and drank back down ate her from the inside out.
@NowhereManChild Local t-shirt printer falls into inking machine and dyes
@ShotoDan2016 He dyed, doing what he loved. He was a great hairstylist.
@Ollie_Llama …unfortunate beginner juggler decision to use weighted chopsticks…

@dragi_d It wasn’t his fault. He was left unsupervised at the strip club
@rllyfunnydragon R.I.P to a beloved Husband and Father. He used to drive us crazy telling Dad Jokes. Now all he can make is Dead Jokes.
@JohnJTerrible He died peacefully in his sleep, unlike his passengers, who died screaming.
@MajorChaotic666 His pronouns we’re zee and zeer

@atch00s She always wanted to be tall and thin. Unfortunately it took a sausage machine to make her dreams come true.
@Halloweeja Died texting while driving. A-hole always needed to have the last word.
@JohnJTerrible
Burial services end at 2pm. An additional hour is set aside for all who wish to piss on his grave
@EpicBngeWatcher He wanted everyone to comment, like, and subscribe to his funeral livestream.

@nosympathy82 Extreme sports athlete cheated death everyday slipped on a banana peel
@Megatallica118 26-year old male lost his head while brutally headbanging to Pantera. Parents are really concerned.
@silkysoul She died dyeing her dying cat’s fur
@abtsag He was born he drank he was boring

@PwrFulWmn She accidentally read “topical” as “tropical” and chugged the bottle.
@SethFromThe716 Whoever is still holding his beer, you can put it down now.
@yabbahead Died from a lack of retweets. God rest his tweety soul
@xcdntlcsmnt Sad he’s gone, but glad he got the answer to his question ‘How much ice cream is needed for brain freeze to be fatal?’

@JeFiggins1987 He died doing what he did best. Did I ever tell you what a great drunk driver Dave was? Well, up until that last time!
@JeFiggins1987 102yo Jerome Figgins died bedding his 18yo 7th wife. It took plastic surgeons 2 hours to remove the smile from his face.
@SethFromThe716 He once said, “YOLO”, and that was all he did.
@BeatusVon “He died peacefully in his beautiful mansion, which is now for sale. Further informations below.”

@robstewart100 You really can’t have Bacon at every Meal
@SethFromThe716 Oh well. The worms will eat a nice meal.
@lordtiddington After a life time of hard work and community dedication, John was found with a bowling ball protruding from his rectum.
@RanNewMan77 the family requests that no one bring tuna casserole or fidget spinners to the wake

@kenny_whiteman Thought that the Kardashians could use a little more mainstream media coverage
@thewritetbkeys You can find his official obituary on MySpace
@FrankRLax61 in death, as in life, he lies here doing nothing while other people do the work, and get stuck with the bill
@JoeCook80543637 died in mid sentence, while writing his final tweet. ” The secret to life is…..”

@BeverleyShaw17 Mother wishes her funeral to be held two weeks before she’s dies as she can’t bear to miss out on anything.
@hulga_hopewell Yesterday, some ugly annoying bitch died. On Saturday; main street will be blocked off for a block party, all are invited.
@in_the_ruins He is survived by some grass clippings and an unopened packet of instant oatmeal.
@ActionRation Went around shooting horses for a while, then ate the insides of a clock and died.

Pictures from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”. “This item is part of a collection of images of downtown Atlanta streets that were taken before the viaduct construction of 1927 – 1929. Later, some of the covered streets became part of Underground Atlanta.”

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