Chamblee54

Are You An A$$hole?

Posted in GSU photo archive, Undogegorized by chamblee54 on October 10, 2019


A facebook friend recently displayed the results of an online test, Are you an asshole? When PG clicked on the link, he was told to sign in with facebook. Going to a clickbait site, and being told to drag in the zuckersphere, is more trouble than it is worth. Fortunately, google has the answer to “are you an asshole?” The fact that google is a corporate sphincter should be disregarded. Today we will look at the page one results. Pictures for this contemptible waste of your time are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”. This is a repost.

How Much Of An Asshole Are You? gets the top spot. Buzzfeed paid for it. This is a typical online quiz. The multiple choice answers never quite seem to fit, so you choose one to get the results you want. “You got: NOT AN ASSHOLE AT ALL!”

Are You An Asshole?, also from Buzzfeed, asks “Have you ever…? There is a list of 22 items. “You checked 4 out of 22 on this list! Don’t worry. You’re a good person. There’s a chance you’ve been a little manipulative or dishonest, but for the most part, it was probably unintentional. The world could use more people like you.”

Are You A Certified Asshole? is a bit of self promotion by Bob Sutton, aka @work_matters. Self promoter is a synonym for asshole. “Are You A Certified Asshole? Find Out With the Asshole Rating Self-Exam (ARSE) A 24-Question Self-Exam by Bob Sutton. Click here to buy the classic “The No Asshole Rule.”” The questions deal with the workplace. “4 to 5 “True”: You don’t sound like a certified asshole, unless you are fooling yourself.”

How Much Of An Asshole Are You? is the facebook tainted thingie at the start of this post. What Kind Of A**hole Are You? has little value. There are more multiple choice questions that have no good answer. At the end, you have to click on an unknowable link, if you want the results. 8 Telltale Signs You’re An Asshole is a further descent into clickbait hell. There are eight items, many of which never occur to anyone over twenty five. Number eight is the catch all: “You don’t think you’re an asshole.”

ARE YOU AN ASSHOLE? is a devolution of the multiple choice concept. “IN YOU’RE SPARE TIME YOU…? HANG OUT WITH BUDS, CUT YOURSELF, PLOT ASSASSINATIONS, EAT SMALL CHILDREN, KILL STUFF.” When you get to question 5 / 9, you see this: “WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO? This question is under review, please proceed ahead.” When you try to move ahead, you are told “Please select an option.” The Belorussian hackers have work to do.

ASSHOLE Quiz is another import from ProProfs. “Your walking down the street and you see a man on the ground and his head is blown off. What would ya do? Ask him if he is O.K., Fain, Call the cops.” After you answer the question, you are told if you gave the correct answer.

Are you an asshole? and The Asshole Test are the last two results on page one. Both are useless. “You’re a good person. You’ll help your friend if he needs you, you’ll buy him a beer if he forgot his purse, and you won’t blame your girlfriend for listening Justin Bieber just because you don’t like this stupid ass faggot. People love you.” There is nothing like validation.

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